I Thought I Had It All

Personal testimony of faith by Roseanne Embry, R.N.

Published in STA Connections, June 1990

I had it all. To look at me now, you would never know it. I drove an expensive sports car, wore only name brand clothes, wore large diamonds, and furs.  At least, I thought I had it all. I wasn’t really happy.  I was too busy trying to make money to have more material things. I went to church on Sunday to fulfill my obligation to my Catholic religion.

Now, none of these material things matter to me.  Did a miracle occur to change my life?  Well, maybe it wasn’t a miracle, but God entered my life.  I was hospitalized for an entire year.  During that time I was given the opportunity to take a look at where I was going and what was important to me.  During that year, I suffered a heart attack, lost both my legs, and went into kidney failure.  God spared my life.  There was still an important mission for me to do here on earth.

God works in strange ways. He might not always answer prayers the way you want Him to, but believe me, He does answer them.

Sometimes I ask God, why is he always picking on me? What about all those people who are committing crimes, and who never go to Church?  Why doesn’t anything bad happen to them?  How can I face people and put a smile on my face when I hurt so badly?

God gives me the strength to smile and carry on.  Those people who have not yet found God may never get to know Him here on earth or in heaven.    Pray for them.

My special mission:  God wanted my soul. Father Bruce Noble prayed with me and my family every night the year I was in the hospital. God not only willed to have my soul, but my husband’s.  My husband went through the RCIA three years ago, and now is very active with the Knights of Columbus.  Prior to this, Ronny had no set religion.  Ronny was never one for material objects.  What makes Ronny happy?  Days that I feel good.  I asked Ronny if he wanted a divorce because my medical bills were so enormous.  He told me that he would forfeit everything to have me with him.  Being with me and having the Lord in our lives mattered more than any material item.

God works in strange ways.  He might not always answer prayers the way you want Him to, but believe me, He does answer them.  I’m lucky to be alive.  I’m lucky to have God and my husband at my side.

As for material things, they don’t matter anymore.  As Nerina, a friend of mine sings: “Jesus got a hold of my life and He won’t let me go.”  My life is complete.  I have Jesus.  Thank you, Jesus. . /

Postscript

Roseanne sitting on her wheel chair, was in our chapel attending mass one morning.  Thelma, another lady that had being sitting across the room from her, approached me and asked me,

“Did you see anything different about Roseanne today at communion.”

“No, why?” - I answered.

“When I lifted up my eyes in prayer at communion time, I saw Roseanne,

but instead of her face I saw Christ with a crown of thorns.”

That happened a few months before her death. To me Roseanne is a Saint-  Her cheerful disposition and love of people will always be remembered by all her friends and family.  Roseanne died in October 1994.  Marta . /

What About Suffering?

Why do Good People Suffer?

On the Christian Meaning of Human Suffering

No Pain is without Significance

A Burning Hut